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Most beautiful / funny stories of the internet

Started by p2, September 28, 2016, 03:54:46 PM

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p2

I noticed there seemed to be no place to share the best stories we read so far.
So here it is now: A place to share whatever amazingly funny or sad story you know ^^

So let's start ^^


I know it's really A LOT to read... But this is soo much worth it guys... *-* One of the sadest but also most beautiful stories I ever read!! Really worth reading even if it would take five hours!  :thumbsup:
Spoiler
right clic and open pic in new tab to be able to read it as it's a little bit oversized... ^^
[close]


This one is much shorter but it's really touching <3  :love:
Spoiler
[close]



Another short one, this one really got me xD Must read ^^
Spoiler
[close]
  • Calculators owned: ti-83+, ti-84+, ti-84+, ti-84+se, ti-84+se(te), ti-nsphire, ti-nsphire CAS, ti-nsphire CX-CAS, ti-voyage, ti-voyage, Who reads this list anyways...?
Anyway war sucks. Just bring us your food instead of missiles  :P ~ DJ Omnimaga (11.10.2016 20:21:48)
if you cant get a jframe set up, draw stuff to it, and receive input, i can only imagine how horrible your game code is _._   ~ c4ooo (14.11.2016 22:44:07)
If they pull a Harambe on me tell my family I love them ~ u/Pwntear37d (AssangeWatch /r/)
make Walrii great again ~ DJ Omnimaga (28.11.2016 23:01:31)
God invented the pc, satan the smartphone I guess ~ p4nix (16.02.2017 22:51:49)

Dream of Omnimaga

Quote from: Sorunome in 2012my little game...my little game..aaaaaahhhhhh...my little game, i used to wonder how to lose the game, my little game, until you shared its losing with me. take the losing and the game, a beutiful game so losable, sharing losing is a easy sweat and losing makes it aweful neat to have my little game togeather with my very best games.

This wins all.

Anyway your 2nd story is amazing but also sad at the same time D:. I don't get story 3, though D: (I didn't read 1 yet because it was very long)
  • Calculators owned: TI-82 Advanced Edition Python TI-84+ TI-84+CSE TI-84+CE TI-84+CEP TI-86 TI-89T cfx-9940GT fx-7400G+ fx 1.0+ fx-9750G+ fx-9860G fx-CG10 HP 49g+ HP 39g+ HP 39gs (bricked) HP 39gII HP Prime G1 HP Prime G2 Sharp EL-9600C
  • Consoles, mobile devices and vintage computers owned: Huawei P30 Lite, Moto G 5G, Nintendo 64 (broken), Playstation, Wii U

p2

@DJ Omnimaga : story three: he's a "Big Metal Fan"... not a human being but such a thing u use when its hot outside ;D
The long one is REALLY worth reading, I even read it twice ^.^

* p2 lost
  • Calculators owned: ti-83+, ti-84+, ti-84+, ti-84+se, ti-84+se(te), ti-nsphire, ti-nsphire CAS, ti-nsphire CX-CAS, ti-voyage, ti-voyage, Who reads this list anyways...?
Anyway war sucks. Just bring us your food instead of missiles  :P ~ DJ Omnimaga (11.10.2016 20:21:48)
if you cant get a jframe set up, draw stuff to it, and receive input, i can only imagine how horrible your game code is _._   ~ c4ooo (14.11.2016 22:44:07)
If they pull a Harambe on me tell my family I love them ~ u/Pwntear37d (AssangeWatch /r/)
make Walrii great again ~ DJ Omnimaga (28.11.2016 23:01:31)
God invented the pc, satan the smartphone I guess ~ p4nix (16.02.2017 22:51:49)

Yuki

Quote from: p2 on September 28, 2016, 03:54:46 PM
right clic and open pic in new tab to be able to read it as it's a little bit oversized... ^^
Or just left click on it. That works too.

3rd one got me, though. 1st one is cute, 2nd one too.
  • Calculators owned: TI-83+ (dead?), Casio Prizm (also dead???)
  • Consoles, mobile devices and vintage computers owned: A lot
Read Zarmina!
YUKI-CHAAAANNNN
In the beginning there was walrii. In the end there will be walrii. All hail our supreme leader :walrii: --Snektron

if you wanna throw money at me and/or CodeWalrus monthly it's here

p2

@Juju: this one will get you, too xD
@DJ Omnimaga: this time with solution at the end :3
Spoiler
[close]

btw why am I the only one sharing texts here  :'(
*except dj's text about losing the game  ;)
  • Calculators owned: ti-83+, ti-84+, ti-84+, ti-84+se, ti-84+se(te), ti-nsphire, ti-nsphire CAS, ti-nsphire CX-CAS, ti-voyage, ti-voyage, Who reads this list anyways...?
Anyway war sucks. Just bring us your food instead of missiles  :P ~ DJ Omnimaga (11.10.2016 20:21:48)
if you cant get a jframe set up, draw stuff to it, and receive input, i can only imagine how horrible your game code is _._   ~ c4ooo (14.11.2016 22:44:07)
If they pull a Harambe on me tell my family I love them ~ u/Pwntear37d (AssangeWatch /r/)
make Walrii great again ~ DJ Omnimaga (28.11.2016 23:01:31)
God invented the pc, satan the smartphone I guess ~ p4nix (16.02.2017 22:51:49)

Dream of Omnimaga

It depends. Maybe other people don't have stories to share? <_<
  • Calculators owned: TI-82 Advanced Edition Python TI-84+ TI-84+CSE TI-84+CE TI-84+CEP TI-86 TI-89T cfx-9940GT fx-7400G+ fx 1.0+ fx-9750G+ fx-9860G fx-CG10 HP 49g+ HP 39g+ HP 39gs (bricked) HP 39gII HP Prime G1 HP Prime G2 Sharp EL-9600C
  • Consoles, mobile devices and vintage computers owned: Huawei P30 Lite, Moto G 5G, Nintendo 64 (broken), Playstation, Wii U

Yuki

Yeah, could say something, but I don't have anything to say right now. Maybe next time I see something interesting.
  • Calculators owned: TI-83+ (dead?), Casio Prizm (also dead???)
  • Consoles, mobile devices and vintage computers owned: A lot
Read Zarmina!
YUKI-CHAAAANNNN
In the beginning there was walrii. In the end there will be walrii. All hail our supreme leader :walrii: --Snektron

if you wanna throw money at me and/or CodeWalrus monthly it's here

p2

from Reddit:
Quote from: https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/5fqwjc/wp_eminem_has_to_tell_the_history_of_the_earth_to/[WP] Eminem has to tell the history of the earth to a group of aliens in 5 minuets or less.
EDIT I'm sorry; I spelled it wrong, it should be "in 5 minutes or less" not "in 5 minuets or less". If a mod sees this, please fix this if you can.

Quote"Sir, we've checked and rechecked the translations, and we are 100% positive that this is what they said," General MacMillan said. The army-man's eyes were blazing intensity, and he knew what he wanted to say. However, attacking the invaders had already been written off the board by higher powers than he.

"Five minuets," the President said. "Five minuets. Not minutes. We're sure it's minuets."

It wasn't a question, but the general answered, "Yes."

"Can Eminem even do a minuet? Doesn't he do...I don't know, do rappers even dance?"

"From what I understand, no, sir, they just bounce around and speak rapidly."

"How can he tell the history of the entire Earth in five minuets?" The president leaned back and rubbed his chin where a beard had grown until five minutes before he entered the political stage. That had been over twenty years ago, and now he wasn't sure that anything in his experience would save him now. "Especially if he can't talk."

"We have people working on it. Choreographers in Hollywood, and others of those ilk. Folks who worked in the opera."

"But why Eminem?"

"We don't know. We still have the option of a tactical, nucle—"

"I told you already, I'm not going to go down in history as the president who caused interstellar war. We give in to their demands, Eminem will dance the history of the Earth, and they'll begin trade with us."

"Sir, I strongly reco—"

"Just have your people keep an eye on it. I'm going to give Eminem a call."

"Yeah, I got it, just ask my daughter Haley," Eminem said to the person who was teaching him ballroom dance.

"How's his progress?" the president asked.

"Better than I would've expected, just watch his turn on the Cambrian Explosion," Rick Leon, Eminem's personal tutor, said. Mozart was playing in the background. "It's beyond graceful. The way he moves...it's just impossible to interpret it as anything but a true representation of Earth's 4.5 billion year history."

"So you think he'll be ready?" As the president spoke, Eminem performed two forward steps, swinging his open hands behind him each time. He spun and stepped sideways, raising his arm as though holding the gentle Earth on a string between his fingers. "Never mind."

Eminem walked to the stage that stood on the National Mall, where the aliens had requested the performance take place. He felt awkward without a microphone in his hand, but he knew it was up to him to save humanity.

Critics, artists, and everyday people watched in rapture as he danced the five minuets. Never in the history of the Earth had anyone seen a spectacle that was simultaneously so stunning yet beautiful, so intense yet graceful, so confident yet lacking that egotistical nature of the rapper's life works. Put simply, it was the culmination of the entirety of human culture.

By the end of the first minuet, people cried. At the closing of the second, they wept. At the end of the third, they closed their eyes, feeling unworthy of the sight that unfolded before them. The fourth minuet ended, and paramedics were on the scene, resuscitating and performing first aid on those who had lost consciousness due to the sheer magnificence of the act. The fifth started, and came close to an end. Those able to witness it, those who had endured the crazed glory of the dances thus far, were the only people to hear the rapper say, "Look If you had. One shot. Or one opportunity. To seize everything you ever wanted. In one moment. Would you capture it. Or just let it slip?" He then dropped his pants and mooned the alien mothership.

A short time passed, and the invasion began.
User "goat_therandy" earned 4677 Points and 3months of Gold with this post... within 17 hours

  • Calculators owned: ti-83+, ti-84+, ti-84+, ti-84+se, ti-84+se(te), ti-nsphire, ti-nsphire CAS, ti-nsphire CX-CAS, ti-voyage, ti-voyage, Who reads this list anyways...?
Anyway war sucks. Just bring us your food instead of missiles  :P ~ DJ Omnimaga (11.10.2016 20:21:48)
if you cant get a jframe set up, draw stuff to it, and receive input, i can only imagine how horrible your game code is _._   ~ c4ooo (14.11.2016 22:44:07)
If they pull a Harambe on me tell my family I love them ~ u/Pwntear37d (AssangeWatch /r/)
make Walrii great again ~ DJ Omnimaga (28.11.2016 23:01:31)
God invented the pc, satan the smartphone I guess ~ p4nix (16.02.2017 22:51:49)


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