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b/Media Talk publicado por u/ordelore March 30, 2016, 03:00:07 AM
Link to the html hosted version that is updated occasionally
So, I'm writing a story, and I'm looking for feedback. Anything constructive/grammar/spelling is welcome.
I have no set release date for updating chapters, only that they will be done when I have time, which is very rare and rationed heavily.
Link to the 'Nightly Build' State Here
Last Edit: June 22, 2017, 09:30:48 PM by ordelore
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u/Dream of Omnimaga March 30, 2016, 04:04:28 PM
Hm I actually like it. I wasn't too sure at first due to the topic being mainstream at first, but as it progressed, I got hooked and I am curious about what will happen next. I actually like the in-school revolution story.
u/Yuki March 30, 2016, 05:03:39 PM
Is that about Jesus? Well, it's pretty nice so far.
u/ordelore March 31, 2016, 02:04:33 AM
Quote from: Juju on March 30, 2016, 05:03:39 PM
Is that about Jesus? Well, it's pretty nice so far.
Correct, the original plan was to re-tell the story of Jesus in a modern setting.

Quote from: DJ Omnimaga on March 30, 2016, 04:04:28 PM
I actually like the in-school revolution story.
It's actually a theme that pops up multiple times in the mini-stories that I write.
u/Dream of Omnimaga March 31, 2016, 02:41:59 AM
For some reasons I didn't realize it was actually about Jesus. O.O I mean, I noticed some similarities, especially near the end, but I thought the intention was to tell the intro to an upcoming social uprising.
u/Yuki March 31, 2016, 05:36:04 PM
Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John kind of gave it away xD
u/Araidia March 31, 2016, 06:02:40 PM
Quote from: Juju on March 31, 2016, 05:36:04 PM
Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John kind of gave it away xD
Same here. I think it would be better if it  was less conspicuous, so that people would eventually find out by reading instead of just knowing right off the bat.
u/Dream of Omnimaga March 31, 2016, 07:37:19 PM
Quote from: Juju on March 31, 2016, 05:36:04 PM
Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John kind of gave it away xD
Not for me, because the names are not in French. :P

Also I downvoted Juju post by accident when trying to click Quote >.<
u/Dudeman313 March 31, 2016, 09:32:19 PM
 I like it! Your modern remix sounds intriguing.
u/ordelore April 01, 2016, 02:03:23 AM
Kinda working on it now, and changed the names so that they are kinda harder to figure out the
[spoiler]Jesus-ness quality of the story[/spoiler]
u/ordelore April 07, 2016, 02:19:40 AM
Bump, I have 3 chapters done now, and I ended up writing much deeper themes than I expected
u/Dudeman313 April 07, 2016, 02:37:39 AM
Deep themes are good themes. The deeper the themes, the more a reader will want to see more.
u/Dream of Omnimaga April 07, 2016, 03:10:57 AM
I just read the new chapter. Nice work so far. :)
u/ordelore April 12, 2016, 09:41:15 PM
Chapter 4 done, but I'm probably going to extend the ending.
u/ordelore April 19, 2016, 02:15:09 AM
Chapter 5 kinda done
I think that I'm just going to get all the stories I want written down, and then elaborate later.
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b/Media Talk

Movies, novels, comics (web, book, animated), manga, TV shows...

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